Rupert's Amazing Feat

WILLIAM E. LOPEZ

HC-66, Box 11014

Crystal, NV 89048

Approx. 2,094 words

Rupert's Amazing Feat!

W. E. Lopez

Two weeks following the big Fourth of July picnic, all the animals at the Lovely Farm decided to have a game of baseball. It was something they had seen when the Dobney's Farm immediately to the west had been turned into a fairground for the picnic celebration and it looked like lots of fun.

No one was entirely sure of the rules, but it appeared to them that if the man with the stick could hit the ball and tag all the safe places and return to his starting point, he would be rewarded with loud cheers and applause from the onlookers. If one of field players could tag the runner with the ball when he was between the safe places, then the watchers would shout and hiss and boo!

Diane the Dove was chosen as the umpire and she picked Porker the Pig, Leroy the Llama, Bluster the Dog, and Steady-Boy the Mule to be the hitters. Next she sent Honker the Goose, Sunrise the Rooster, Giselle the Goat, Laverne the Llama, Rupert the Squirrel and Solomon the Owl to play the fielder's positions.

"But where will I play?" asked Boobah the Rabbit.

"You're going to be the catcher," said Diane.

"Oh, wonderful!" Boobah shouted and jumped up and down. Then he paused and asked, "Diane? What does the catcher do?"

"Don't be a silly goose," said Honker. "The pitcher throws the ball and tries to hit the batter! But if the pitcher misses, you catch the ball and throw it back so the pitcher can try again!"

"Oh, I see," Boobah said. "Okay, I understand now."

"Well, I think that's just plain silly," Mrs. Mischief observed. "Why would anyone want to be a target for a baseball? I would rather be taking a nap on a nice sunny day like this. I think I'll go lay in the shade beneath Rupert's tree. Perhaps I'll watch your dumb old game from there."

"Oh, don't go, Mrs. Mischief!" Giselle shouted. "Everyone knows we have to have a cheering section to shout at the player's and the umpire. We need you to be the shouter!"

"Meeroow?" asked Mrs. Mischief. "Cats do not demean themselves by shouting, Giselle. Sometimes we purr when we are pleased, or we scream when we are angry, but we never, never shout!"

"We're wasting time," said Bluster. "I want to get this game going. I'm gonna hit that ball all the way to Crane County, you just watch me!"

So the player's took the field and the stick men lined up to take their turn defending themselves with an old ax handle instead of a regulation bat. Bluster had found a baseball that the players had lost in the woods during their game, and Laverne strode to the pitcher's mound and prepared for the first pitch.

Rupert found himself far out in the field, beyond the safe places that had been marked out for the runners to rest at. Because they had so few players, Solomon was playing right field and Rupert was playing the left field position. Laverne grabbed the ball between her teeth and flicked her neck to the rear the way a horse will when annoyed by a pesky fly. Then she snapped her head forward and sent the ball straight at Porker.

Porker may have been a little chubby, but she was very quick. She stepped slightly to her left and when the ax handle connected with the ball, it went sailing far over Laverne's head and hit the ground in right field. Solomon watched it bounce twice and begin to roll. He flapped his wings and leaped into the air and swooped down on the fast moving ball and grasped it in his talons. He was off again and flying after Porker who was just rounding second base and on her way to third. Solomon swooped in for the kill and touched the ball to Porker's shoulder.

"You're out!" yelled Diane and jerked a wing into the air as she had seen the umpire do.

"Yeaaah!" shouted Boobah from his position behind the home base. "Hooray!" shouted several of the hens that had formed a cheering section.

"Bleert?" asked Mrs. Mischief.

"Out means that Porker has to go out to the field and work up to being a stick man again," said Diane. "Meanwhile, Boobah will move up to become a hitter. Laverne will become the catcher and everyone else will move up also."

"Then what's the point to this game?" the cat asked. She carefully moistened one paw and began cleaning behind her right ear.

"There doesn't have to be a point, Mrs. Mischief," Steady-Boy said. "It's a game. Just a fun way to pass an afternoon."

"Yaawwwnnn," the cat observed. "I think it's all quite boring and I still intend to take my nap. I have to be on guard against mice after the sun goes down, and I need my rest."

Leroy the Llama was up next and Honker threw him a fast ball that was low and outside. Leroy stretched his long neck and hit the ball with a loud crack! It went skipping along the ground to Rupert who was now playing third base. Leroy was a very fast runner and had all ready reached first base and was heading to second by the time Rupert scooped up the ball and began running. Even with the added weight of the ball, Rupert could scamper faster than Leroy could run and he reached second base before the llama did. Leroy extended all four legs to brake to a sudden stop but Rupert tagged him with the ball and Diane yelled again, "You're out'ta there!" Diane was feeling very happy being an umpire.

"Whew! That sure was close," said Rupert. "I didn't realize that ball was so much heavier than a hickory nut, and much harder to grab hold of too!"

"You did very well," said Leroy. "Even if it does mean that I have to go out and play the field now."

So all the animals moved forward one position and that was how Giselle came to be pitching to Bluster. Giselle had an unusual manner of pitching. She would put the ball on the ground and turn her back on the stick man. Then she would raise her left-rear leg and give a powerful kick. Zoom! The ball would take off straight at the batter. Bluster blinked in amazement as the ball went past him and straight into Laverne's glove.

"Strike one!" shouted Diane.

"A strike?" Bluster shouted. "What do you mean? That ball was so low it was kicking up dust! You better get Farmer Lovely to buy you some glasses, Diane. You're blind as a bat, you know?"

"The umpire's decision is final," shouted Giselle from the pitcher's mound. "You're just too slow to hit my fast ball!"

"I'll hit it this time, you scrawny goat! Try again!"

Giselle set the ball down on the mound and turned her back. Turning her head, she lined up for a perfect pitch, lifted her leg and… zoom! The ball was off again. This time Bluster swung as hard and fast as he could, but he missed!

"Strike two!" said Diane.

Bluster could not argue since he had swung at the ball and missed. "I'll hit it next time," he said. Giselle went through her routine once more and the ball was sent fast and straight at Bluster. Again, Bluster swung and missed!

"Strike three! You're out!" called Diane.

"Not fair! Not fair!" Bluster shouted. "I had dust in my eye! Do it over!" he pleaded.

"Be a good sport and take the field," Laverne said. "You'll get another chance to show us how good you can hit."

Bluster was unhappy, but he took the field anyway. His turn would come again soon enough. Next came Steady-Boy who hit a line drive to third base. Solomon swooped up the ball and carried it to Rupert so Steady-Boy was forced to hold up at first base. Boobah swung next and hit a squeaker to Sunrise who leaped into the air and caught it under one wing. Sunrise tossed it to Rupert and Steady-Boy had to turn around and run back to first. But Rupert gave it a surprisingly powerful toss to Sunrise who had moved in between the mule and first base and was about to tag Steady-Boy. The mule turned around again and ran in the direction of second base but Sunrise was too quick and flicked the ball to Rupert. Steady-Boy tried to stop and turn at the same time and ended up tripping over his own feet as Rupert caught the ball and tagged him.

"You're out, Steady-Boy! And you too Boobah! It's a double-play!" The hens in the cheering section squawked and cheered. They had never seen anything so exciting! Mrs. Mischief arched her back and stretched her legs.

"Well, I must certainly say, that was good." She stretched out full length again and rested her chin on her paws. Maybe this silly game could be interesting, she decided.

And so it went, for two more plays, then the clouds turned black and a heavy rain began to fall. It was quick, and heavy and the animals took shelter in the barn while it lasted. Soon it stopped and the skies cleared and Rupert found himself taking the batter's box. The ax handle the other batter's had used proved to be much too heavy for him, so Giselle found a short length broken from a broom handle and gave it to the squirrel. Rupert hefted it and decided he could swing it okay.

Now it was Leroy's turn to pitch and he used the same style as Laverne. He grasped the ball between his teeth and pawed the ground with his feet. Flicking his head to the rear he let go with a powerful toss and the ball headed straight for Rupert!

The squirrel could see it coming. His first instinct was to run and get out of the way. But he held his ground and gauged the approach of the ball and then swung as hard as he could.

Thunk! The ball hit the little broomstick and sent a jolt up Rupert's tiny arms, almost knocking him to the ground. Off he scampered toward first base while the ball traveled only two feet and splashed into a mud puddle left by the storm.

Solomon was catching now and he pranced around the mud puddle trying to find the ball as Rupert was rounding first base and heading for second.

"Find it quick!" shouted Leroy who had come in from the pitcher's mound to help Solomon.

"I can't see it!" Solomon declared. "You know an owl sees best in the dark!"

"Then feel for it!" Leroy urged.

"What do you think I'm doing?" Solomon said. He was jumping up and down, in and out of the puddle looking very much like a robin in a birdbath. By this time Rupert had rounded second and was half way to third base. He ran and ran, his tiny heart beating and his lungs pumping until he felt something must surely burst.

Leroy was pawing at the puddle, but his efforts only seemed to stir up more mud. Solomon couldn't feel a thing. He kept jumping and splashing while Leroy kept pawing as they both searched in vain for the ball.

Rupert rounded third base and put on an extra burst of speed that seemingly came to him out of nowhere. He stretched his legs and reached far in front of him while his bushy tail lay flattened and streaming in the breeze behind. Run! Run! Run! It was all he could do! Eight feet from home plate he gave a mighty leap and stretched far to his front. His belly skidded on the muddy earth and Rupert easily slid into home plate.

"Safe!" Diane yelled.

"Hooray! Yeeaahh!" squawked the hens. "Rupert made a home run! Rupert made a home run!"

It was true! Rupert could hardly believe his good luck. He had scored the only run in the whole game because of a rainsquall and a ball that got lost in a mud puddle. Rupert could smile with satisfaction. Even though he was the smallest and weakest of all the animals, he had done something none of the others had done. He had hit a home run!